are you there vodka its me chelsea free ebook

are you there vodka its me chelsea free ebook

Seems reasonable, when considering that she discovered her boyfriend was having an affair with a Peekapoo and she had to pretend to be honeymooning with her father in order to upgrade to first class. In this highly entertaining, deliciously skewed collection, Chelsea mines her past for stories about her family, relationships, and career that are at once singular and ridiculous. Are You There, Vodka? Chelsea Handler is an accomplished stand-up comic and actress, as well as the bestselling author of My Horizontal Life.

She is the star of her own late-night show on E! Chelsea makes regular appearances in comedy clubs across America and lives in Los Angeles. Handler's style is a friendlier, more workaday version of the haughty self-abasement practiced by Sarah Silverman, leavened by the everywoman spirit of Kathy Griffin She seems like a cruel queen bee from an expensive college: There's something suspiciously sophisticated about how her jokes line up that suggests the moral austerity of a comic not of [Joan] Rivers's bad-girl school: Tina Fey.

Download pdf. Remember me on this computer. Enter the email address you signed up with and we'll email you a reset link. View all 11 comments. Mar 13, Monique rated it really liked it.

Cutting edge, funny sexy stories. Having seen Chelsea doing stand up and on Girls Behaving Badly, I was anxious to see how her wicked sarcastic wit would translate into text. It's fantastic! A seriously gifted writer, who combines funny and raunchy better than any woman. I mean wild, hilarious and uninhibited story telling. And it's not just the sheer ridiculous situations she encounters. She reflects about her mindless journeys and the meaning of life in such an amusing, self-deprecating cynical Cutting edge, funny sexy stories.

She reflects about her mindless journeys and the meaning of life in such an amusing, self-deprecating cynical manner. She just has that trashy comedienne's gift of saying everything we think about but are afraid to say. And she manages to share absolutely horrifying situations and somehow make them hysterical! There are some hilarious and uncomfortable family situations. Her father was quite the provider of wisdom, selling used junkyard cars out of their front yard, while making inappropriate sexual innuendos towards his daughters.

She shares some really funny embarrassing youth debacles and misadventures, and of course her bizarre sexual encounters with some serious screw ups. My favorite of Chelsea's embarrassing re-collections: her preposterous fake celebrity elementary school tale, a LOL birthday party for a friendless girl full of re-gifting, pretending to be honeymooning with her father in order to upgrade to first class.

The Mini-Me and Prison Break chapters are just classics. Frankly if she wasn't successful, she may have ended up a basket case. If you are sensitive or quick to take offense, I would pass on this one.

If you have a repressed wild side, you'll dive in headfirst and relish her antics and live vicariously through them. Also, if you like reading funny out of control drinking and sex stories, I'm half-way through Chelsea's other book May 14, Leah rated it it was ok Recommends it for: those looking for a light, entertaining read.

Shelves: read , purchased , junk. It's Me, Chelsea to be an overall entertaining collection. The first four essays were, far and away, the 'best' in the collection. Until reading this book, I had no familiarity with Handler. Totally underwhelming and inconsistently hilarious. Admittedly, the parts that were funny really were fantastic. However, Chelsea Handler glosses over and re-arranges life events in order to align them just so - and thusly make Admittedly, I don't usually read books like this, but found Are You There, Vodka?

However, Chelsea Handler glosses over and re-arranges life events in order to align them just so - and thusly make whatever anecdote she's recounting work like one of her performance jokes. Everything works just a little too well for these to be legitimate essays. Rather, the book reads like an ongoing stand-up routine with more detail added.

Overall, it's a good effort: Handler isn't the best writer and is occasionally downright dismal , but her stories are generally amusing. View all 16 comments. Oct 08, Dan rated it did not like it. This sort of book and the positive outpouring for it make me really feel like I must have missed the boat somewhere in the last couple decades of culture or something. Maybe it is that I have never seen Handler's stand-up and came to this book expecting something a little bit different.

Perhaps Handler's shtick is that she is merely making a tongue-in-cheek imitation of the cliche "mean girl" that we all know from our high school days. But without being let in on the charade, I found connecting This sort of book and the positive outpouring for it make me really feel like I must have missed the boat somewhere in the last couple decades of culture or something. But without being let in on the charade, I found connecting with Handler throughout the book to be basically impossible.

The humor mostly seems to consist of criticizing everyone in her family, her circle of friends, and anyone else she meets in her life - most typically in a way that falls a tad short of catty, landing mostly in the realm of bitchy. Admittedly, Handler does trot out a few story moments that provoked grins and the occasional laugh. Its clear that her escapades are wildly fabricated in places where the truth might have been more banal or required even a fleeting moment of self-reflection.

Furthermore, despite all of the tweaking, many of the stories were pretty boring, just tossing in blunt comments and sailor-speak doesn't turn a dull day out into comedic gold. I had heard this book likened to some of Sedaris' essays, but find that the comparison to be wildly off-target. Sedaris brings a sort of quiet thoughtfulness to his humor, and is most frequently the target of his own jokes.

Handler, instead, brings a sort of crass entitlement to her judgments, too good for even those she is telling her story to. View all 3 comments. Apr 29, Alexis rated it really liked it. Ah Chelsea, Hilarious. Read this on the plane ride back from atlanta. She never disappoints and I'm certain i annoyed rows 18 and 20 of Airtran Flight , and possibly rows 17 and 21 at certain points in the book with my laughter. Would recommend it to anyone :.

Jul 23, Gonzalo Urrutia rated it really liked it Shelves: nonfiction. Chelsea Handler just might be the most obnoxious, dumb smart person ever. Yet this book was hilarious, and I couldn't read it fast enough. Sometimes that's all it takes for something to be considered good.

Dec 11, Lyndsey rated it really liked it Shelves: audiobooks , reviewed , reviewedstars. This woman is easily the funniest woman in the entertainment industry.

Yes, she's rude and crude, and definitely not for the prude. But I just can't help it. I love her. She brings out the evil maniacal laugh in me, if case you didn't already notice. Since her other book is entitled "My Horizontal Life : A Collection of One-Night Stands", you can be fairly certain this book will also include sexual content as well as a lot of adult language.

So if those make you uncomfortable, don't Buhwahahaha! So if those make you uncomfortable, don't read this. At least not while others of a prudish nature are around. She does have a deeply dark sense of humor. It seems to be all in good fun, though not necessarily good taste. I like to believe she's a softie at heart, just with a hard exterior. Nevertheless, she's entertaining to say the least.

I really recommend listening to the audio book. A sheet of paper just cannot capture the brilliance of her wit and sarcasm. Her voice can be slightly overwhelming at times, but if your feeling down, her stories will bring you, if nothing else, hilarity. What are you going to do tonight, Chelsea Handler? Same thing she does every night - Try to take over the world. The entertainment world at least. I listened to this on audio and like my GR friend Kelly stated, Chelsea's voice can be a bit much.

Also, did all of these things truly happen? Some of them seem a bit over the top and maybe a bit embellished to make a better story?!? I think calling her dad "bitch tits" is bad. It just sounds stupid to me. There were quite a few times when I laughed out loud though.

I am certainly not opposed to reading more of her stories. I used to watch her show on tv and I wonder if any of he 3 stars for me. I used to watch her show on tv and I wonder if any of her girlfriends in the book were some of the comics on the show.

It never stated if any names were changed. View all 5 comments. Feb 02, Judy rated it really liked it. What was I thinking when I put this book on my list of audios that I wanted my audioflix service to send me? Oh well, give it a try, I thought, as I slid the first disk into the proper slot in the minivan. Well, I'm glad that I still have my lightening reflexes and battle tested driving skills because I was careening down the interstate laughing out loud at this book while going 80 miles per hour and you thought that driving while talking on the telephone was dangerous.

Chelsea Handler picks s What was I thinking when I put this book on my list of audios that I wanted my audioflix service to send me? Chelsea Handler picks stories from her family, relationships, childhood, and career for this group of hysterical essays. The best part was that she read this book so I didn't even have to imagine hearing the stories in her voice.

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To browse Academia. Skip to main content. By using our site, you agree to our collection of information through the use of cookies. To learn more, view our Privacy Policy. Log In Sign Up. Cathryn Henderson. Are You There, Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea. Download pdf. Remember me on this computer. Enter the email address you signed up with and we'll email you a reset link. Need are you there vodka its me chelsea free ebook account? Click here to sign up. are you there vodka its me chelsea free ebook Are You There, Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea by Chelsea Handler - Welcome to Chelsea Handler's world—a place where absurdity reigns supreme and a quick wit is. It's Me, Chelsea showcases the candor and irresistible turns of phrase that which means that you need to install free software in order to unlock and read it. It's Me, Chelsea" by Chelsea Handler available from Rakuten Kobo. by Chelsea Handler · Audiobook. $ eBook. $ Free with Trial I love how Chelsea doesn't take herself seriously and there's not much else in her life that she. When Chelsea Handler needs to get a few things off her chest, she appeals to a higher power—vodka. Seems reasonable, when considering that she. Are You There, Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea book. Read reviews from the world's largest community for readers. When Chelsea Handler needs to get a few t. It's Me, Chelsea. read ebook Online PDF EPUB KINDLE,Are You There, Vodka? It's Me It's Me, Chelsea. free download pdf,Are You There, Vodka? It's Me. Download Are You There Vodka Its Me Chelsea ebook for free in pdf and ePub Format. Are You There Vodka Its Me Chelsea also available in. It's Me, Chelsea PDF Download book for those of you who love to read. You can PDF ePub book is available in PDF, Kindle, Ebook, Epub, and Mobi formats. It's. Me, Chelsea PDF ePub Full Online, epub free Read Are You There, Vodka? Are You There, Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea is a best-selling book by Chelsea Handler that was released on April 22, , by Simon Spotlight Entertainment. A quick look inside: Are You There, Chelsea? Finding libraries that hold this item Whether she's convincing her third-grade class that she has been tapped to play Goldie Hawn's daughter in the sequel to Private Benjamin, deciding to be more egalitarian by dating a redhead, or looking out for a foulmouthed, rum-swilling little person who looks just like her It's Me, Chelsea showcases the candor and irresistible turns of phrase that have made her one of the freshest voices in comedy today. Man-woman relationships. User-contributed reviews Add a review and share your thoughts with other readers. Life doesn't get more hilarious than when Chelsea Handler takes aim with her irreverent wit. You may have already requested this item. Anyone preparing a course assignment, applying for a job or for college admission, or doing any other formal writing needs to know the standard conventions of punctuation. Anyone preparing a course assignment, applying for a job or for college admission, or doing any other formal writing needs to know the standard conventions of punctuation. Whether she's convincing her third-grade class that she has been tapped to play Goldie Hawn's daughter in the sequel to Private Benjamin, deciding to be more egalitarian by dating a redhead, or looking out for a foulmouthed, rum-swilling little person who looks just like her, only smaller, Chelsea has a knack for getting herself into the most outrageous situations. are you there vodka its me chelsea free ebook